Insomnia or Unwilling to Sleep?

All the computers in my room are off (and trust me, I have quite a few), I'm super tired, have to be up in 5 hours for work, and yet I turn to my phone to compose a pointless blog.

I'm literally in bed ready to sleep and yet all I can think of is what I have to accomplish tomorrow. So I pose this question to you all, what is it that you think of in those moments before you nod off?

My thoughts always consist of work. It's the only thing that ever keeps me up. On weekends I stay up to my heart's content, but weekdays I must impose a (fluid) bed time; yet I never stick to it. Am I a workaholic? That's in the eye of the beholder (personally, I would just say super dedicated).

Sleep? Why? I could do so much more with my time... *yawn* but aging requires I get some... Til tomorrow folks.
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Rollin' in Style

I was leaving the movie theatre after watching The Book of Eli (worth watching) and I couldn't help but laugh at the fact there was a limo in the parking lot.

For the life of me I cannot fathom where the patrons of the limo were being chauffeured to. Movies? Cold Stone? El Bracero? Little Caesar's? Either way I found it humorous.
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The Loner Boner - A Repost from an Old Blog

Editor's Note: This is just a repost from a blog I used to run. The original post date was 17 October 2008. The original title was Miserable Relationships, but I thoroughly enjoy its new title more!

For about the past two weeks the subject of relationships was a constant conversation topic. After catching up on some RSS feeds that I am subscribed to, I came across a blog stating that love is not enough to save a relationship. Upon reading this I decided to conduct a small poll amongst my Myspace friends. It was a simple question.

Which is worse: being single and lonely? Or, in a relationship and miserable?

I have to admit, as I started this poll, I was probably a bit biased in my views. Realize, I have never been in a relationship -- ever. I'll allow you to guess what my personal view was at the time.

However, after conducting my mini-poll, it seems that my personal view might have been a bit skewed from what many others thought.

I've already stated that I have never been in a relationship before. Some may view this as the reason why I would vote towards 'Single and Lonely'. On the contrary. Well, not so much contrary, but let me explain myself. I've never been one who was on the hunt or prowl for a relationship. I always grew up waiting for my storybook (more specifically, my Disney story) relationship -- that's another blog in itself that will come soon. But I always wanted to be independent. I didn't want someone else to come along and be my 'other half' to make me whole. I want to be someone who is happy on my own before I start a relationship expecting them to make me happy. I personally believe that someone who is depressed, saddened, lonely, or has any of those other less-than-desirable feelings, is not one who will attract what they hope to find out there. I want to be stable in almost every aspect of my life before I try to commit to one person; be it financial, physical, emotional, or career related. So, I never felt lonely. At least not in the aspect I was referring to.

But still, why did I think that the loner boner was the worse of two evils? I guess I should have put a few caveats out there about the intentions of my study and what, specifically, I was looking for and how I intended each word to be interpreted.

When it comes to myself, I don't feel I am a lonely person. I think of the lonely person as one who WANTS to be in a relationship. Don't get me wrong, there are times when I think to myself, 'Damn, this sucks.' But I'm usually referring to skin-to-skin contact. All I usually have to do is bag one for the night and I'm good for another few months or so. LOL (TMI maybe? Nah, never!) But I've never wanted so bad to be in a relationship that I signed up for websites like Match.com, eHarmony.com, or Chemistry.com to find someone to 'complete me'. So, when I used the term 'lonely', I meant someone who wants a relationship so bad, it makes them miserable.

On the other side of the coin, when I used the word 'relationship', I was leaning more towards relationships that were longer than six months and had quite a bit of time, emotions, feelings and even money invested. I will say that from the few comments left on the poll page, most people assumed the same.

Enough blabbering from me, I'll cut to the results.

A whopping 35 people voted on my poll. Thanks to those who did. Special shout outs to Ann, Julian, Mo, Nay and Luis. These were the five that left comments. Greatly appreciated!

Approximately 3:1 voted that being 'in a relationship and miserable' was worse than being 'single and lonely'.

Click here for poll results.

Now, after seeing the results, and especially the comments, I took a step back to try and encompass why most people would say that a miserable relationship was worse than being single and feeling lonely. I will admit that the comments left were definitely what turned me on the right path to enlightenment.

There are many things that can turn a relationship into one way lane to misery. After all, misery does love company; so why not a couple? For the sake of this blog, I will attempt to focus more on why people stay in a relationship as opposed to where misery begins.

My number one pick is comfort. Does it not make sense? When people are in relationships, they acquire a routine; they know the ins and outs of their partner. Familiarity even. Or, the fear of never being intimate with another is somewhat misted and blocked because, even in a bad relationship, that slight elbow nudge in bed, or the accidental spoon position in the middle of the night, might be just enough skin-to-skin contact that is necessary to ease the mind. I think that maybe I hit the right note when I used the word fear. Once someone has somebody, they fear they will never find another who will love them as much.

I think another major reason for sticking it out in a miserable relationship is financial stability. I mean, let's think about it. How many friends do you have in relationships in which one has more take home income than the other? I personally know quite a few. Now, how many people do you know in which one partner earns much more, and they live together? Finances play a major role in relationships, no matter how much love was, or even is still, there.

There are many other factors. Some people are blinded by lust, mistaking it for love. Hope. Some people hold on to hope with the expectation that things will turn around. The list goes on and on.

As to why I expected 'Single and Alone' would have dominated in this poll... well, quite honestly, it can be a big suck-fest if you let that loneliness eat you inside out. There are so many out there who LUST FOR LOVE. I repeat LUST FOR LOVE. Why? Why? WHY?

With this, I finally end my first blog. I hope that it was coherent enough. I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to hear some feedback on this blog. Until next time, have a great day.

GQ's Got Me Covered

So I'm reading GQ Magazine's January issue and I noticed they took my motto and placed it on the top right of their cover. I can't be angry with this; after all, it is a great motto for this year. I just wanted to say kudos to them for knowing a good statement when they hear one!

However, I was intrigued by the article about annoying Facebook friends. As I was reading the article I couldn't help but chuckle at the truth behind the 'article' [if you can call it that]. But then I got to thinking -- am I one of these people.

It's no secret that I'm a fairly savvy and prolific Facebook-er. At the house, at the office or on the go, I interact with my Facebook. I'm not ashamed about it; I would say that, at the very least, my posts are quite entertaining. It would be safe to say that I have a few friends on there that are dedicated followers, and to them, I send my thanks.

But what about the other friends who are not as addicted [for lack of better words] as others? Do I fall in to one of the 18 categories that GQ has established? Naturally, I started to compare myself to each classification and started to justify how it doesn't apply to me. Quite honestly I don't think I was part of any of the categories, which was a relief. Of course I re-thought my thoughts [am I allowed to say that?] and I took a step back. I'd have to let others judge me if I wanted the truth.

After even more deliberation I decided that it doesn't matter. Whether I fall in to one of the 18 'annoying' categories, I still have friends [in the real world, too!] and in the end I am having fun and living life, which is all that matters. After all, that's what I wanted to do this year, isn't it? Live more?

Now I know that playing PS3, messing around on my iMac, reading magazines or watching UFC might not be living life to the fullest. But knowing that all of this is going on in the world, experiencing it, and still having time to hang out with friends doing random things like trips to Vegas, trips to Baltimore, bowling, movies, plays, shows, concerts, and a plethora of other things proves that I am having fun -- and this is what matters to me.

Thanks GQ. You got me covered.

All About Me -- A Perfect '10

Ahhh... 2010. The year that is going to be a perfect '10. In fact, that is my motto for this year, at least part of it. Bobat's Motto:

All About Me, A Perfect '10

This motto is meant in the least egocentric manner possible. In recent years my life has revolved around friends and family, all who I love dearly. But I need to bring my focus back to the person who will be there with me until the very end -- me. I'm not shunning anybody out of my life; I'm not going to become a recluse; I will continue to be the same person I was before. It's just now, I have to ensure that all endeavors undertaken will be in the best interest in my future before I put my entire focus on it.

This sudden shift in direction of my focus was not warranted by a specific, defining point in my life. On the contrary, I would have to say that my most recent deployment to Afghanistan -- 1 Dec 08 to 30 Nov 09 -- afforded me the opportunity to really think. This thinking lead to the realization that I am ready to graduate from 'young adult' to 'adult'. All Friends have to make this transition and I am welcoming my time with open arms. So, all this being said, let me explain briefly my intent behind this blog.

I will hopefully be a Broadcast Journalist in the US Army starting in June of '10 and graduating in Sep '10. I want to start being even more involved in life than I already am. I'm starting this new blog; I'm making video logs (vlogs?); I'm learning Twitter; I've already mastered Facebook; I might get involved on Myspace again; basically I want to connect, no, I want to INTERACT with as many people as possible. I already have quite a few friends around the globe. But I want to encounter others who have the same ideology as me. I want to learn new ideologies. I want to get out there and be a real reporter. So, that is the intent with this blog. I know it won't start off like that; but I hope that what I have to say is intriguing enough that any who read this will feel they should recommend my blog to others. Don't worry folks, we'll get there one day.

Wow. As short as this is, I feel accomplished! More to come soon folks...